Purpose

Purpose.
I’ve lost it somewhere in the five hundred and thirty-seven loads of laundry
buried in piles of toys and papers
lists of things to do.
Lost
in a mind too tired to hold onto any one thing
but constantly turning each over
unable to admit its malfunction.
Empty over time.
Looking for Purpose.
Christ says we must lose our life
(for His sake)
to find it.
Step One.
On to Step Two.

You
lost your life
on the cross.
but also
in every choice
every word
every action
For someone else.
For everyone else.
There was no time for a life.
It was your life.
What life should be.
If I could be perfect.
but I get lost,
a different way
without purpose
And they say You’ve felt that too, but,
Could you a
Perfect
human making
Perfect
choices fulfilling a
Perfect
plan from Heavenly Father who was always with you
until that one moment
(why have You forsaken…?)
can You understand not knowing?
Taking a wrong turn
losing Purpose.

I think about You walking in a sea of people.
Listening but not hearing.
You having to give
Knowing the end from the beginning
and no one WITH you
(except for God)
Did You feel alone living here?
Getting lost in the miracles
in the politics
in the people
just NOT getting it.
not seeing You.
no matter what you do.
Because
(I think)
You teach
Perfect
doesn’t mean not tempted.
Never lost
doesn’t mean not alone.
Having answers
doesn’t mean not having questions
and
getting lost
is usually when the right questions are shown.